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Skunks attack London, originally uploaded by Kevglobal.

Being possibly one of the few people working for the London media who doesn’t engage in user testing of illicit drugs and also being from a place where skunks are in fact small creatures with a big smell, my first thought at seeing this headline was of hordes of rabid black and white animals running rampant over our gritty city. Yes, it took me a second or two to switch my brain to consider that this headline, in fact, referred to highly potent marijuana that is sold in Camden just to name one place.

However, even I didn’t realise the darker side to this story, which was revealed on the authoritative news site – Shitegeist.

Dramatic new evidence of the dangers of rogue jihadi animals emerged today as government scientists warned that a most harmful “stink” is flooding our streets.  … An un-named source at the Ministry of Baseless Scaremongering said that a lethal ‘Al Qaeda skunk’ (acting on orders from Osama Bin Laden’s cat) was responsible for flooding large parts of the Whitechapel area, after meddling with an unknown number of sewerage facilities and getting several members of the Thames Barrier maintenance crew monged on Grade A grass.

Be afraid. Be very afraid. It’s your civic duty.

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